Posted: June 6, 2010 in Uncategorized

I feel like a trendsetter. I like to be innovative, and I’m a naturally creative person. But no, I’m a trendsetter without a trendsetting personality.

I invent to separate myself from others. I add bits of spice and sugar in my writing. I never start an essay with an intro that’s about the topic I’m going to write. Because the best articles treat the reader like a confidante (hopefully that’s spelled correctly): you need to talk to them personally, treat everything you tell them as a secret. No, you shouldn’t put your cellphone number in the essay, but your essay shouldn’t be like a narrator on a PBS documentary: nonfictional and straightforward (unless you’re doing a report, of course); it should be light and conversational, without too much intimacy. (By the way, the New Yorker is a magazine that has fabulously written articles; I use those journalists as my example ;D)

In my music, I emulate my teacher, but sometimes I add a trill on a bland half note lost in a brilliante section; sometimes I add an extra frill on a 22-sixteenth note run marked stringendo in the middle of a cadenza that would otherwise only be a fancy variation of the theme. You have to put yourself into your own work. You have to distinguish yourself.

Which is why I create. To make myself stand out, look unique, colorful, and even grotesque at times. I admire and try to copy others, but never completely. Not even halfway, if I can help it. Because that’s not the point! You use their style, but you aren’t supposed to… If it was a painting, use their methods, their styles, something in the range of their subject matter, but you have to make people guess around. You want to make them say “Well, it could be Picasso, but…” and add a little skepticism, the more subtle, yet ironically dramatic, the better.

I see myself reflected over and over in my dreams. The occupations I want to work: the only non-innovative one really is psychologist. The way I dress: I used to buy from A&F and Aero, but now…I’m not interested so much in the brand names. I hate the overpriced simple layering pieces, like solid color tees and camis. I’m looking for more art, but I don’t want the brand’s label to be the spotlight anymore, unless if it’s going to be on the tag. I’m not interested in those stores anymore: I go to more boutique-like stores with various designers in their racks. GITI and Gap are popular stores in my list of visits. I read more Marie Claire and see what’s hip in the next month, and try to incorporate that into the suddenly relatively little wardrobe of clothing that I have. (And of course, this only adds fuel to my rebellious side against uniforms. And Puppet Guardian players should not be in the same room with me when I’m on this site XD)

I won’t mention names. This rant is something to let me vent. I should write in my journal, but part of me wants to share it. So I made a blog to let the world know, and let a small audience really feel. Unfortunately, my past several posts might have been biased towards the people I know. So I’ve been trying to open my writing up.

Puppet Guardian: My best friend. Some people like to be admired, but there are some things I don’t want to be copied in. If I get a certain kind of armor, she’ll ask “How did I make it?” But to be polite, despite the selfish plea in me, I tell her. I mean, I can’t just say “I’m not telling you.” right? It was all I could do to stop her from getting the same color. And later: the shoes, the accessories. She eventually quit because I suppose Puppet Guardian bored her and her boyfriend dragged her onto another [MMO]RPG, and we got along, we laughed, on the game. But there was constantly a tug inside me.

WordPress: the blogs. And this just started today; well, for the most part.

I discovered WordPress via Puppet Guardian’s blog. I was fascinated. Starting in fourth grade, when I was addicted to Pokemon fansites, such as Eonlight Valley, Cave of Dragonflies, and Eevee’s Headquarters, I learned HTML. I experimented: Webs, Yahoo Geocities, whatever free resources I could find. I studied HTML diligently (now I’ve forgotten most of it ;_;) and tried to make my own site.

In sixth grade, I discovered the Warriors Fan Site, thanks to my friend Danielle. And with it came wetpaint. Me and my roleplaying friends in my grade created three or four roleplaying sites, but it never really boomed. It was centered more around us–we knew each other, treated each other almost too warmly on a community site for any others to join. The News page talked about school happenings–and still does. But we enjoyed our fictional world, and it still manages to dangle above ground today. I also rediscovered HTML somewhat, which I missed–and Wetpaint lacked. I logged back onto my Freewebs (today it’s “Webs”) but to my dismay, there was no HTML. You had to choose a layout, etc.

WordPress is probably one of the best free hosts I have ever used. It’s not good for managing a gigantic fansite where you would put more than one hit counter and twenty pages, and you have to choose from layouts called “themes” but…it’s just, different. It’s like a newer version of the older Webs. You can edit it Visual/HTML. CSS coding, with some money…It’s just fantastic. So WordPress, you can credit yourself some pride points or an ego boost XD

Earlier this year, one of my friends in sixth grade made a blog. I didn’t really mind it that much; she wrote good literature (I know that you’ll read this post, you can get an ego boost too for something I never would have the selflessness to tell you at school XD) and her rants amused me. So that’s okay, right? Who cares if she chose the same theme, she had a nice banner.

Today: God, oh god. And I don’t even believe in God. What the heck. Two of my friends create blogs to talk about, what, random items that no one in the outside world cares about? No nice long rants, articles, or opinions? If you want to share about your thoughts in a nutshell, get a Facebook, or a Twitter. But people with blogs want to share something.

I know it’s your freedom, and I don’t go against that.

Some of my posts are brief, but I can account that for my moodiness. Sometimes, it cheers me up more to post on my blog than my Facebook or Gmail chat/Talk. And I direct it, as much as I possibly can, to a public audience. And I want to write good literature, of which i have a miniblog for that. Discuss.

But why make a blog like that? Oh, if you weren’t “inspired” by me, what did inspire you? I ask. No comment, or brb, or even worse, gtg.

You already know I have an odd personality. Maybe it’s unnatural to ignore this kind of idolizing or emulation or admiration. I never said that I was the first person to make a WordPress. But this is who I am, and I just want to send a shoutout today. You know who you are.

Perhaps this isn’t complaining about trendsetting. I just want to say, the so-called blogs you people created aren’t blogs. They’re private, personal Twitters, Facebooks, posts all smushed into one large one for the day. Whenever I log on WordPress, I browse through the “Freshly Pressed” section. I never see any of that…stuff.


* * *

To make up for my long rant, I have a yummy recipe that my SECME team did for a solar oven competition down in Cocoa Beach. Unfortunately, I was unable to attend because of an orchestra competition. And I haven’t tried it yet. But if I don’t this year, it will be next year’s resolution to. I will get them to cook it for me, or I’ll bake myself ;D Resolve!

Molten Chocolate Cakes With Sugar-coated Raspberries

8 servings

1 cup unsalted butter/margarine
8 ounces semisweet chocolate chips/bars, cut into bite-size chunks (good chocolate)
5 large eggs
1/2 cup sugar
pinch of salt
4 teaspoons flour (or matzo meal grounded to a fine powder in a blender
8 XL muffin cups (or regular muffin cups to make 12)
1 (6 oz.) containers raspberries, barely moistened and rolled in about 1/2 cup sugar right before serving

Melt butter and chocolate in a medium heat-proof bowl over a saucepan of simmering water; remove from heat. Beat eggs, sugar and salt with a hand mixer in a medium bowl until sugar dissolves. Beat egg mixture into chocolate until smooth. Beat in flour or matzo meal until just combined. (Batter can be made a day ahead; return to room temperature an hour or so before baking.)
Before serving dinner, adjust oven rack to middle position; heat oven to 450 degrees. Line a standard-size muffin tin (1/2 cup capacity) with 8 extra-large muffin papers (papers should extend above cups to facilitate removal). Spray muffin papers with vegetable cooking spray. Divide batter among muffin cups.
Bake until batter puffs but center is not set, 8 to 10 minutes. Carefully lift cakes from tin and set on a work surface. Pull papers away from cakes and transfer cakes to dessert plates.
Top each with sugared raspberries and serve immediately.
Drizzle over with raspberry sauce.

Our theme was old-style; “Vampiric” was our team name. The batter/cake part of the finished product was supposed to be dark, so that the raspberry portion would be, uh, “bloody.”

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed it. I can tell you that my teammates did 😀

Now that I look back and today’s post I think “Holy Squee”; looking back is a good way to rethink, refresh yourself, and analyze truly how destructive or sappy you can be.

* * *

Links (that I can remember out of the top of my head):

A&F –

Aeropostale –

Gap –

Marie Claire –

Puppet Guardian:

  • English sever:
  • Japan sever:

Eonlight Valley –

The Cave of Dragonflies –

Eevee’s Headquarters –

Freewebs (Webs) – (I’m not sure if still works)

I’m pretty sure the links for Gmail, WordPress, Facebook, and Twitter are apparent ;D Umm…if you need help with those, google them XD

  1. nevermoraven says:

    Basically, what I’m trying to say is:
    I don’t invent to start a bandwagon.

    • Fire and Ice says:

      Aw, thank you, darling 🙂
      I agree with you on the “other friends” part…*coughs*
      I was inspired by you…you’re a great writer…a touch of oddity, a pinch of depression, a teaspoonful of randomosity, a shake of rant-i-ness…but you’ve got potential, and I don’t think I’ll ever be able to say this to your face, because I’m not as awesomely selfless and kind and sweet and perfect as I think (not really), but I’d like to put this through writing, because that’s the one way I can express myself for the person I really am, the person I want to be, the person I once was. Oh great, now I’m getting all emotional. *tears up*
      But I think that’s how writers write. They’re not as haughty and high-up and all as they think…they gather inspiration from fellow writers, and that’s perfectly fine. Because writing is the best way to communicate. I don’t care if a picture is worth a thousand words; a picture is just a portrait of something that was in the past, that was just captured–for a brief instance–and faded away. (BTW, half of this is going on my blog post. Lolz XD). But words can last forever, resonating in the hearts of millions.
      I was moved by MLK Jr.’s I have a dream speech, really. And that was the day–when I was, what? In second grade?–I began to write. (Great. Now this is becoming ‘Beverly’s writing history!’ WTF?)
      Where was I? Oh, yeah.
      We all choose to leave memories in our own ways. Some people stick with making shallow scoops in the sand.
      But others–the really special ones that strive to be SOMETHING–make a footprint.
      And twenty years from now, I think I’ll still have your footprint on my heart.
      ~Fire and Ice

      • nevermoraven says:

        XD I just like to stay unique.

        I hated writing up until fourth grade. That’s also when I became engrossed in, ah, vocabulary. But my LA teacher was really nice and I think I would be a bad writer today without her motivating me. I remember my first graded essay being a 3.5/6.0 XD

        I just get really annoyed sometimes. I mean, I guess it’s okay if you talk about your life. But the things they write…sometimes I slap my own high personal standards on other people.

        Now I’m in a calm state of mind and don’t feel like ranting anymore, but I don’t really regret what I said. Vanna said she was inspired by Julie & Julia (or vice versa, I forgot the order. I just started watching it last night btw ;D It’s good so far), but her blog isn’t Julie & Julia. It’s one thing to emulate. It’s another thing to be forever trapped in your own days, when there are so many other things to talk about. I read the New Yorker, watch the news, and review things. I like my opinion to be heard.

        Right now, I’m eating blueberries and looking through my musical dictionary. Watch me be sitting in my seat tomorrow just reciting musical terms & defs from this 757-pg. dictionary XD

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